Are you looking for a fresh start with your career or a way to get out of your current situation? It might be time to drop your loser friends. That’s the advice from the CEO of a multi-million-dollar company on how to achieve real success, and his blunt words could lead to the jumpstart you need.
Gary Vaynerchuk, CEO of VaynerMedia, knows that most people don’t want to hear about the need to drop friends who are holding them back, but the advice can be life-changing.
“Maybe if you got rid of one friend or spent a lot less time with one friend who’s a real drag and a negative force and added a positive person in your office … If you switched it from 80 days hanging out with your negative friend and one day with your office acquaintance who’s super positive, to four days with your negative friend and 12 with this new person,” he said, noting that he has seen people who cut out “loser” friends change their lives completely and have huge emotional and physical improvements.
As difficult as it to hear Vaynerchuk’s solution, most people will find that it resonates. Spending time with friends who are negative can be a drag on your performance and self-confidence. If you are trying to train for a marathon, for example, and your closest friends would rather go to the movies and the bars every weekend, you are less likely to train and achieve your goal of running the race.
Vaynerchuk’s advice is to audit the people who are around you if you really want to change your situation. Take an inventory of what those people bring to your life and remove the people who aren’t contributing enough or who are bringing you down, just like a business owner would cut out unprofitable business segments or unproductive employees.
Dropping Friends Works
As candid as Vaynerchuk’s advice may be and as difficult as it may be for some people to hear, he isn’t the first successful person who has offered such advice. Motivational speaker Jim Rohn famously said you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with, meaning that if one or two of your friends are lazy, negative, or boring, their characteristics will rub off on you and bring down your average, leading to less success.
“The rule suggests that the five people you spend the most time with shape who you are,” says Melia Robinson of Business Insider. “It borrows from the law of averages, which is the theory that ‘the result of any given situation will be the average of all outcomes.’ We might interact with many people, but the few who are closest to us have the greatest impact on our way of thinking and our decisions.”
Consider the five people you are around most often and how they contribute to your average. Even spending a little less time with these people could completely change your situation.
Which Friends are Best?
Dropping loser friends doesn’t mean you have to be alone, however. Many millionaires and successful people agree that surrounding yourself with people who are more successful than you will lead to an increase in your own success.
Successful people are attracted to other successful people because it expands their thinking, challenges their ideas, and inspires them to be better. If the five-person average is true, surrounding yourself with five successful people means your average will also be very successful.
Successful people tend to emulate other successful people—in this case, following the advice and example of a successful CEO and evaluating and dropping negative friends could lead to great success for you, too.